A New York State of Mind to Lone Star Living

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Ten years ago, a colleague walked into the faculty room announcing, “Who are these mid-lifers selling their family homes and moving? Building new homes? My friends are crazy! I’m exhausted thinking about it!” She went on…

I’ve thought of her a dozen times since Mother’s Day when my husband and I signed to build a new home. In Texas. 1528 miles from where we’ve lived our entire lives.

Last summer (2024) I wrote a short series of mid-life moving posts. We sold our family home in less than 24 hours, packed, stored and moved into a temporary new apartment.

Going from acres, a pool, nature….all the wonderful things about “home” to an apartment, albeit a very nice, spacious one, was a change we never adjusted to.

Despite my dear colleague’s sentiments, many New Yorkers head south for warmth and some tell me they relocate to get away from their adult children asking for babysitting.

We are the opposite.

We’re moving to the great state of Texas, down the road from our youngest who will be starting a family in the new year, God willing.

We always planned to leave New York. Five years ago, we were ready to sell and relocate to Virginia or North Carolina. Then, our daughter fell in love and married a Texan taking over the family business, grounding them for the near future. Our plan altered just a few states west.

After four years of prayer and several trips to Texas, we finally had peace.

In the last month I’ve not posted as often nor been able to read every one of your posts because we moved from the bigger apartment to the smaller one we’ll keep in NY (hubs job is based here, and our twins remain in NY-for now😉). Both of us will fly back and forth. Then, we arranged the moving truck for the rest to be delivered to the great state. It’s been as crazy as my colleague said!

So, we’re packing up again to move to TX where I’ll make a “family” home for my children and future grandchildren.

Moving earns its place on lists of “most stressful life events”. The emotion of it is real – the goodbyes to people and stuff that can’t go with us. Some who move say they stress about where to place the silverware drawer, wonder about navigating unfamiliar streets, different people, places and new routines.

But therein also lie the very elements that make this an exciting adventure.

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53 responses to “A New York State of Mind to Lone Star Living”

  1. Looking for the Light Avatar

    Moving for me is a dread and super exciting. We’ve finally started our home search, several years to late for me, but I’m excited and dreading packing. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      The packing is definitely a bummer. I try to focus on how fun it will be to open the boxes that have been in storage and it will be like Christmas!
      I’m so happy for you having this new adventure. All the best as you continue searching for the perfect home!🤍🏡🤍

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Tom Avatar

    I enjoyed the update! I wish you all the best in your relocation to Texas!
    Every year I dislike the Western New York winter cold and snow a bit more, but both our sons and grandchildren live here.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      I understand about your sons and grandchildren. Our twins also plan to relocate which is the only way I could move forward. The WNY/Upstate weather is miserable this week!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Jeff & Charmé Avatar

    Sounds exciting! Especially making a new nest for your growing family, future grands. New memories!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      A new, warm and welcoming nest is my focus🥹❤️. Thank you, Charme!

      Like

  4. Mama's Empty Nest Avatar

    Wishing you the very best on your big move. You know, everything’s big in Texas! 😉 Seriously, I can imagine all the many prayers behind this decision. Having moved to different states in our married life, I know first-hand the emotions you feel. May God bless you and your family in this new life adventure.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      I know you can relate after all of your moves and children in different states. I’ve taken a dozen trips to TX in the last 4 yrs and once stayed a month. So many visits and much prayer.
      Thank you for the blessing🤍.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Jacqui Murray Avatar

    Homes in two such different states. That will make interesting posts.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      Very different states! Stay tuned…

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Terry Avatar

    Congratulations on your move! I’m sure that it’ll be all you’ve wished for. What part of Texas? We sure enjoy our winters in the Southernmost tip.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      Thank you, Terry! I always enjoy following your months in Texas and adventure going back up to CA. We will be 40 minutes outside Austin in hill country. It’s a very small town which suits us but close enough to amenities.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Terry Avatar

        I have a very dear friend who lives in Llano (the heart of hill country) We visit there every year on the way down, and occasionally on the way back home too. We love that part of Texas 😎

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

          So nice that you have such a close friend you can stay with. How interesting to enjoy several parts of TX, different terrain, etc., during your annual travel south. We are looking forward to exploring our new area!

          Liked by 1 person

  7. Judy Avatar

    Congratulations! God bless your efforts.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      Thank you so much, Judy! I appreciate your blessing🤍🤍.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Judy Avatar

        ♥️

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Chris Avatar

    Enjoy your new adventure. We moved from California to Arkansas 25 years ago and have never looked back!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      Thank you!🤍 I appreciate hearing about others who have relocated and are thriving like you!

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Dawn Pisturino Avatar

    My daughter and her boyfriend just moved to Galveston Island, Texas. They methodically planned it for a year, and everything went smoothly. But the stress of moving and coping with the change has caused more than one fight. Even good changes cause stress.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      So glad your daughter had a smooth transition. Even the best laid plans meet challenges. Galveston is several hours away from where we will be but we did visit there last summer. I wish your daughter all the best getting truly settled.

      Like

  10. Phil Strawn Avatar

    Moving to Texas is a good idea. I know many folks who have moved to Granbury, my hometown, from California, New York, Pennsylvania, AZ, and other states. You will love it here, once you get used to our hot summers, which can be brutal at times. There’s a saying that’s so true: ” I wasn’t born in Texas, but I got here as fast as I could.” God bless Davy Crockett and the Alamo.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      😄Yes!
      Our new in-laws were originally from Michigan and tell us how quickly they expect we will acclimate and love Texas. We have gray skies and stretches of snow/rain for at least six months here in NY. Jackets required for nine. We will be fine with a couple months of unrelenting heat!

      Like

      1. Phil Strawn Avatar

        Us Texans were made to suffer, it’s in our genetic history. The five months of summer allow us to keep a good tan and look good when winter comes, which last only a few months, or weeks. I don’t know where you are moving, but if there is an H.E. B. grocery store in your town, it’s the best one in Texas: started in San Antonio back in the 1930s.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

          lol about Texans made to suffer😄! We will be minutes from a brand new H-E-B that just went up. My daughter is very excited for us to shop there as we do whenever we travel down for visits. It truly is amazing and I thought Wegmans was great until I met H-E-B!!

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Phil Strawn Avatar

            Yes, they are akin to a mild religious experience. Momo gets very emotional and serene when we grocery shop, lights a prayer candle and all that.

            Liked by 1 person

            1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

              😂😂😂

              Like

  11. equipsblog Avatar

    Good luck, we moved three times in the last decade.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      Thank you for sharing your experience in the last decade. Moving twice in a year has been daunting. Now to TX as the third move, we are ready to nest!

      Like

      1. equipsblog Avatar

        Hope it everything you want. 🤞🤞🤞🙏🙏🙏

        Liked by 1 person

  12. lghiggins Avatar

    Moving is never easy, but is certainly more pleasant when you CHOOSE to do it rather than having it imposed on you. May you enjoy living in the Great State of Texas!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      That’s very true – choosing is better!
      Thank you!❤️❤️

      Like

  13. Anne Mehrling Avatar

    I loved moving to NC. I hope you will greatly enjoy living a divided life in Texas and NY. Maybe you will have the best of both worlds.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      For a while we will, ultimately settling in TX full time. Particularly for our two remaining in NY for now, we want to have a NY presence. I’m encouraged by your comment about how much you enjoyed your move to NC.

      Like

      1. Anne Mehrling Avatar

        That’s nice to do the move in stages.

        Liked by 1 person

  14. Lauren Scott, Author Avatar

    We’ll be in the same boat next year or in 2027. Five years ago, it sounded fun and adventurous, but now it’s beginning to sound daunting. We love where we live, but we’d like to downsize in our last chapter. 🙂 And ideally, we’d love to be closer to at least one of our kids. But our son is in CO. and our daughter is in TN. and neither are truly rooted. So we’re hoping that when we’re ready, the picture of where to go will clear up. We have ideas, and there are healthcare and weather factors also. We can’t handle the hot heat and prefer cooler temps. But the snow makes us pause too. LOL So for now, it’s one big murky move! I hope all works out for you and your family!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      You have named so many important considerations that go into a move. Especially as we get older and our children are in different locations. I completely understand your dilemmas. We felt the same five years ago – it sounded like a wonderful adventure. I can assure you because I’m now in it — yes it is daunting!! I’m sure it will be more fun once we arrive and start settling. Hopefully once you go in the decided direction, your kids will follow🙏🏻!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Lauren Scott, Author Avatar

        🥰🙏🏻

        Liked by 1 person

  15. shoreacres Avatar

    Forty miles outside Austin in the hill country sounds perfect to me! I’ve had friends in the Kerrville/Medina/Comfort area for years, and have spent a lot of good times there. If I had to name a ‘happy place,’ that would be it.

    The New York/Texas pairing brought quite a memory to mind. When I moved to Houston for the second time in 1981, I was driving a mustard-colored Toyota with no air conditioning and and “I Love NY” bumper sticker on the rear. When that car got totaled on a Houston freeway, more than a few people said, “You should have peeled off that sticker!” If there was any benefit to that accident, it was getting a car with AC.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      Wow!! That is quite a story along with some terrific life memories! You described it so well I can envisioned that New York sticker on your bumper. Thank you for sharing all of it! We are looking forward to exploring our new area and meeting new people.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. Awakening Wonders Avatar

    Welcome – y’all ready for some Texas-sized fun! Enjoy the boots, BBQ, and wide-open spaces!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      Thank you! Yes, we look forward to all of it!

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Jeanie M Avatar

    Wow, what a journey! Reading this totally resonates with the ‘most stressful life events’ bit. Moving is no joke, and neither is navigating life changes that sometimes involve, ahem, different kinds of big family decisions. I’m actually dealing with some family law stuff myself right now, so I definitely feel you on the emotional rollercoaster. Best of luck with the new home in Texas – sounds like a wonderful adventure awaits!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      The stress is real, along with the emotions. We are thankful to be on the back end of the packing, organizing trucks, etc., and moving officially next week. I wish you the best with the family law issues you are going through. Thank you!

      Like

  18. believe4147 Avatar

    I’ve moved a few times but never far from where I grew up. No matter where it is yes moving involves stress. I hope you and your family all the best.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      You must have a strong group of close family, having remained near where you grew up. That is very special.
      Thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. believe4147 Avatar

        It had been a blessing to be around so much of our family. Not a lot of people can say that.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

          You’re very fortunate indeed💗.

          Liked by 1 person

  19. Greg Dennison Avatar

    I’ve been thinking about moving a lot. My 30s were kind of fun, but not doing the kind of things to build a future on. My 40s have been miserable. Many of my friends from my 30s have moved away, there’s nothing left for me here, and everything new I’ve tried the last few years have just left me feeling more out of place. But I also have compelling reasons to stay, mostly financial and work related. I just don’t know what to do anymore… it sounds like it’s worked out well for you, though.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      I hope you can build new relationships where you are if you choose to stay. If you decide to move, prepare for an adventure! I wish you the best either way.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Greg Dennison Avatar

        Thank you… it’s a complicated issue with a lot of unknowns and moving parts, and I don’t like to make big decisions without all the relevant facts.

        Liked by 1 person

  20. Amy Avatar

    Wish you the best! We have lived in TX for decades, TX is big. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mid-Life Mama Avatar

      Thank you! All my TX trips in the last four years have taught me how enormous the state is!

      Like

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