Someone I’ve known for decades posts a photo of their daily latte each morning and usual hamburger for lunch on Facebook, along with a selfie every 5000 miles while waiting at the oil change place (per my kids who occasionally look at FB).
These types of posts have generated hundreds of followers on Facebook. In real life, he is isolated and purposefully disengaged. I’m highly familiar with his history and social/work involvement.
This bothers me.
My daughter quips, “why do you care Mom? Why do you care who posts or scrolls or likes social media?” She continues, “Youuu don’t have to use socials, but why care if he only has imaginary vs. actual friends?” I struggle to articulate a worthy response. “I don’t know why right now. But, I’ll get back to you…”
I know people who openly admit their days begin by rolling over in bed with Instagram, followed by coffee and Facebook for an hour. This has been their routine for over a decade. Many don’t post. Several do. Either way, they openly and happily admit that it’s hours of “collecting” what other people are up to. This makes me uncomfortable.
My daughter’s words echo, “Mom! Why do you care?!”
I was out with my family celebrating a special event months ago and ran into someone we have not seen in years. The gentleman proceeded to rattle off a series of happenings with my kids and then announced my son’s girlfriend’s parents’ occupations! I sat quietly until he finished, then asked, “how in the world do you know what her parents do for a living?”
“Facebook.”
My daughter laughed out loud.
He explained the friend of a friend of a friend (really?) had mutual followers and saw some images and he did some further research on his own through other accounts…
“He did research?!” I start analyzing once we’re all in the car. “We barely know each other…yet, he readily possesses all of that information?!” Daughter shakes her head. “Mom, stalking everyone’s social media is normal.” It’s official. I’m not.
I received a text from my husband just last week of a Facebook screenshot that was sent to him. It was of a relative on my side with deep troubles. The caption alone was unfortunate. Why was it posted at all and why did the man send it to my husband?
For those with normal relatives, Facebook is a blessing and I get that. Facebook is the go-to for many start-ups when they don’t want to buy a website to post their store hours. Facebook has been used to organize very worthwhile activities, allow evangelism, and provides inspirational readings. But, are these the few things keeping people on socials 17+ hours per week, accumulating “friends”?
From the user standpoint, social media seems relatively innocent. From the corporate conglomerate side, Meta owns Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, Messenger, Threads and other companies with far more in mind than your “connecting” to friends and relatives.
Algorithms used by Zuckerberg and other social designers are extremely complex and impossible to understand for the average person. That’s how Meta likes it.
There is also a fragile balance between regulation in a free country and a free-for-all. Congress can’t fully figure out this infinite Metaverse (nor Google’s dominance in modern society). Therefore, they (Meta/Google/Apple) decide what information is “governed” and what is permitted. Despite Zuckerberg presently claiming that moving staffers to Texas will “prevent them from censoring users“, Meta still gets final say in all content.
When I ask frequent users if the live-streamed murders or censorship affect how they use Facebook, they answer no. When I ask how they think Zuckerberg’s team can censor some information instantaneously while streaming horrors like the end of a life, they shrug. When I question if the massive data collection (even when you’re not on FB) bothers them, most people respond, ‘“they” have all of our information off our phones anyway, who cares?’
“Mom, why do you care?”
Answering my daughter’s question will be next – followed by the promised WordPress post.
Thank you for reading.
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Tales from a Mid-Lifer 
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