Tales from a Mid-Lifer

I love love and rarely watch a rom-com I don’t enjoy. But my affinity for love-stories does not carry over into teenage public displays of affection (PDA’s).

They bother me.

Teenagers are managing hormone-raged bodies, while their heads and hearts lag far, far behind. That part isn’t their fault. But, social graces and public vs. private behavior? Rapidly deteriorating in modern culture.

I was on my laptop at a table in the library lounge, when a teenage couple wearing swimsuits entered. The space is a coffee area where people read and drink a latte before returning to the “book section” of the library across the hall.

The teen couple appeared 15-16yrs. old with a younger brother in tow – maybe 9-10yrs. The bossy tone of the teenage girl confirmed the younger brother was hers. Clearly, they were using the area as a reprieve from the heat, a community pool within walking distance.

As teen boy stands to buy a snack, his kiss lingers on the girl’s lips. I’m a Mom rolling my eyes. He returns, sits down, her bare leg crosses his…arms entwine…

Yuck.

This feels inappropriate in a public place where the 70-something year old man two spots from their couch is trying to read his book. He shifts in his seat at the sight. After decades in an office, or on a job site… rearing children…maintaining a house – the gentleman just wants to sit mid-day without that view!

The couple remain oblivious to the man and I exchanging raised eyebrows. More importantly, the younger brother sits awkwardly with a beach towel, tapping his flip-flopped feet, wondering what to do with his eyes (didn’t have a phone).

I’m assuming Mom and Dad are at work and sister got tossed brother to watch for the day. Mom and Dad may or may not be aware of the boyfriend part of their daughter’s afternoon. Either way, the poor kid’s face makes me near say something. But, in the last several years I’ve curbed my longtime practice of smiling wide while articulately suggesting improved behavior.

Encouraging decent manners was my Mom-responsibility when my three were growing and interacting with all sorts on fields and in hockey rinks. Now? Like the retired guy across from me, I just want two-hours of peace where someone else is in charge.

I gather my belongings and reserve a glass-enclosed study room back across the hall. Re-setting up my laptop, etc., I look forward to library-quiet.

Within minutes, the mid-life man in the next “study room” over starts ranting on the telephone about a grievance. Loudly. For 30 minutes.

A toddler wanders by my room, and his father follows, having a full-on telephone conversation.

A woman seats herself at a table outside of my glass doors, making phone calls in front of the book-lined shelves. She’s selling something. Announcing her name and why she’s calling.

What happened to “the time and a place rule”? Propriety? Modesty? Does anyone blush anymore? Do they hear themselves?

Maybe I chalk it up to an unusually loud and bizarre day at the local library. But it’s hard not to question whether basic decorum has been replaced by overall disrespect in shared public spaces…by teens and adults alike.

Photos: mine, family5power.com-books in library in Blairquhan Castle, Maybole, Ayrshire, Scotland. Featured photo: mine, family5power.com-Trinity College Dublin library; University of Dublin, Ireland.

🍀Thank you for reading on this Monday.🍀 Have a wonderful week!🍀